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Showing posts with label Comedy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Comedy. Show all posts

Monday, May 12, 2008

Playlist: Ode to the Political Leaders

In one of my usual semi-humorous rants with a friend I realized that every leader in Lebanon essentially has an 80's song dedicated to them in regards to this conflict. As a result I have compiled a playlist for everyone's favorite Lebanese politicians!

The whole conflict can be summed up by "red skies at night" by the fixx

The Government, summed up by "She's A Man Eater" by Hall & Oats:

Al Mustaqbal's Faoud Sanoria and Saad Hariri: "Relax" by Frankie Goes to Hollywood
The PSP's Walid Jumblatt is: "You spin me right round baby right round" by Dead or Alive
The Lebanese Force's Samir Geagea is "Let it Whip" by the Dazz Band
Kataeb's Amine Gemayel is "One Thing Leads to Another" by the Fixx


Reason's behind selection:
Government: Describes how Hizbollah is trying to "chew them up"

Mustaqbal: first line of the song, "relax don't do it...when you wanna come." Describes the militia, and the lack of prowess Saad and Sanoria have so-far shown.

Jumblatt: Come on! that should be self explanatory, even the name of the band describes the

Druze position in the Chouf.

LF: Hizbollah is scared out of it's mind of the LF and the Christian fighters, while Geagea isn't advocating that his groups go out and attack the enemy, he's waiting for them to try something.

Amine: He's waiting on the lines with many of the Kataeb supporters, still trying to push the Gvt. Line..."you'll run for cover...Why don't they say what they are...Do what they mean...One thing leads to another."

The "Opposition" (citrus colors included); If they were Riverdance we would call them "Lords of the Coup"

Amal's Nabbieh Berri: Love Is A Battlefield by Pat Benatar
The SSNP's 3ali 2anso: "Turn Me Loose" by Loverboy
Hizbollah's Hasan Nasrallah: "Burning Down the House" by Talking Heads
the FPM's Michel Aoun: "Out of Touch" by Hall & Oats
al Marada's Suleiman Franjieh Jr.: "Video Killed the Radio Star" by the Buggles

Reasons Surrounding Selection:

Mr. Berri: Has always demonstrated his loyalty to his Damascene masters! Love like that usually results in fighting with your sugar daddy's enemies!

The SSNP: I hate to bestow a good song on such a group of fools. 1. come on their whole ideology is a Levantine version of the Nazi Party, but better yet, the song represents their main goal as a "party" to just be turned loose on democratic organizations or ...Hm...NEW STATIONS AND NEWSPAPERS!

Good ole' Hasan: Song is self explanitory, need I remind anyone of the Sayyed's pledge to, "not use his arms on Lebanese"?

General Aoun: Mr. Nationalist is still siding with the coup currently in place and he actually believes that he is the only one keeping the peace in the Christian areas. Quick summation: Psycho!

Mr. Franjieh: My favorite song to select, because he likes to say he is a new face of Lebanese leadership, meanwhile he is just the same version of a morribund system involving zuama with their village based patronage system. Reasons I selected the song: It's an 80s classic about how VHS and technology were taking over from the "old school" radio stars. Nonetheless in retrospect (from 2008) people still giggle because VHS tapes have been obscelete since the mid 1990s...Essentially it's the not so modern replacing the already ancient, but casting itself as something BRAND NEW!

The "Neutral Army"

"Big Time" by Peter Gabriel describes the Army

Gen Suleiman: "So Caught Up In You" by .38 special

Army Selection:

The Army can now finally find it's place in the neutral sun, disarming and disobeying the govt. while forming a closer connection with their buddies in Hizbollah---They are BIG TIME now!

The OTHER (other then Aoun) General is so caught up in Hizbollah and letting them keep their arms (hence the .38 special band name---didn't that fit perfectly?!) that he will probably be their post-military coup selection.

Other Notable Personalities:

Wafiq Shaqir: "Somebody's Watching Me" by Rockwell

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